Trent Shelton: Embracing Adversity and Cultivating Inner Strength
Jan 02, 2024Season 6Episode 1
Ben Newman
Does losing your every dream feel like your life is over? For former NFL player Trent Shelton, it was the beginning of a journey that would make him an icon of resilience, toughness and authenticity. In this episode of the 'burn,' he shares his unfiltered story, from the struggle with failure, athletes' life pressure and his enlightening encounter with a man that led him down the path of mindfulness, peace and strength. Trent talks about his upcoming book, 'Protect Your Peace' and invaluable advice for those struggling to be themselves in a chaotic world. Stay tuned for a powerful conversation about the true grit it takes to be a great athlete and an even greater human being.
Pre-Order Trent's New Book HERE--- https://amzn.to/3tLiBaT
Special Offer for listeners of The Burn- first 100 only! Email me ON MARCH 5TH to get YOUR free copy - We will send you a free copy of Trent's new book! info@bennewman.net - If you email early it will not count, it has to be the week of March 5th!
Connect with Trent Instagram https://www.instagram.com/trentshelton/?hl=en
Straight Up with Trent Shelton on Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com › podcast › straight-up-with...
Does losing your every dream feel like your life is over? For former NFL player Trent Shelton, it was the beginning of a journey that would make him an icon of resilience, toughness and authenticity. In this episode of the 'burn,' he shares his unfiltered story, from the struggle with failure, athletes' life pressure and his enlightening encounter with a man that led him down the path of mindfulness, peace and strength. Trent talks about his upcoming book, 'Protect Your Peace' and invaluable advice for those struggling to be themselves in a chaotic world. Stay tuned for a powerful conversation about the true grit it takes to be a great athlete and an even greater human being.
Pre-Order Trent's New Book HERE--- https://amzn.to/3tLiBaT
Special Offer for listeners of The Burn- first 100 only! Email me ON MARCH 5TH to get YOUR free copy - We will send you a free copy of Trent's new book! info@bennewman.net - If you email early it will not count, it has to be the week of March 5th!
Connect with Trent Instagram https://www.instagram.com/trentshelton/?hl=en
Straight Up with Trent Shelton on Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com › podcast › straight-up-with...
And I had no external evidence that something was more for my life. I want to be clear about that. But I had an internal alignment that says you're made for more. That's when you see what you're truly made of. So for me, adversity is not a bad thing. Adversity when is a mask? Adversity's mask is oh, this is bad adversity, oh, this is going to end my life. Actually, you take the mask off of adversity. All adversity is an opportunity to show what you're really made of.
Speaker 2:
Welcome back to another episode of the Burn. I am Ben Newman and you got this thing figured out. You know how we do this every single week we're bringing you a story of an athlete, an entertainer, a celebrity, a coach, somebody who's recognized in their life that why and purpose is not enough. There's this underlying burn that ignites your why and purpose and causes you to be disciplined on the days you don't want to do it and especially after you win. Let me tell you something. I am lit up and fired up today to have my friend Trent Shelton on this show. So let me tell you something. You guys know I've been doing this a long time. Trent's been doing this a long time.
Speaker 2:
Everybody knows who Trent is and we step on a lot of stages and we meet a lot of people and for a long time people had said you got to meet Trent. You got to meet Trent Even when we didn't eat online event for John Gordon years ago. Man, you guys got to connect and just never had a chance to connect live until Brendan Bershard had us out for his growth day event. Man, I'm telling you, this stage was lit up. This is going to make Trent smile. Brendan comes out with the LA marching band. He's skipping all over the stage Like the guy absolutely had it lit.
Speaker 2:
It was the most amazing day and I watched Trent stand on this stage and he's one of those captivating speakers and communicators that just blew me away and I was just appreciative that he sees. I got that K-State helmet there, him being a former Baylor bear, that we can at least cut up and still do the podcast to be friends, former Big 12 guys who would go at it. But I just was blown away by the man that Trent Shelton is, how he communicates, how much he cares. You hear it in the side conversations about family not wanting to be away longer than he needs to be, but also serving and giving exactly where he is at that point in time. And I've been around a lot of speakers and you don't see it this raw, this real, and so I couldn't be any more fired up to welcome my friend Trent Shelton to the burn Ben, what up man.
Speaker 1:
That might be the best introduction I've had, man, so I really appreciate you. Thanks for having me here, and the compliments are right back at you. When you engage somebody in this industry, that's real. You can feel their heart, man, it's always a beautiful thing. So thank you for being you and thank you for having me.
Speaker 2:
Man it's. We could go for like hours and hours, and I prefer to keep these tight because my attention span is a little bit leaner, and so here's what I'd like to do. I want to get right down to it. So a lot of people know your story. I mean, you have built the most dynamic brand to help people take adversity and turn it into belief and power authentic power, as you like to refer to it as but I want you to take us back to how did that begin? You know so much success as an athlete. Where did those behaviors and discipline come from? Where did that burn come from, Not only going to Baylor, but also doing what many kids dream of doing, which is making it to the NFL? Take us back, Like where did the burn to create discipline and work and face adversity come from for you?
Speaker 1:
Yeah, you know, I think it goes all the way back to a young man. It goes all the way back to a young child growing up in New Orleans and I've had two older brothers, so I'm the baby boy, the family and my mission was to always to beat my brothers. You know, one's four years older, one's six years older and so they were always rough on me in a good way, you know. They always pushed me and always attribute my athletic success to him to them, because I'm having to beat them. So when I get against kids my age, it's easy, but they taught me at a young age and my father too. They taught me at a young age the words that I share with the world, like it all starts with you. You know you have to put in the work and discipline in order to be what you want to do and be and do what you want to do. I was fortunate to be able to have an example of the dream. So what I mean by that and I call it normalizing the dream I do this with my kids. I do this with kids that I coach. I try to take them around it, to show them that this dream of making this an NFL or a college football player, whatever you want to do, it's very possible.
Speaker 1:
I got a chance to grow up around across the street from a guy named Gene Atkins. Geno Atkins is his son, but Gene was playing with the Saints at that time and we were really good friends. Me and Geno grew up together, really good friends, and the thing that I saw every single day I saw him putting in the work, jogging around the neighborhood, you know, going to his house, seeing him work out, and I was like, oh Snaps, this guy is normal. I didn't understand this as a kid, but I'm like this guy is a normal guy. And so that moment made me realize that Normal people can still make extraordinary dreams happen if you just decide to dedicate, putting the work and be real with yourself. And so, as a four or five, six-year-old Looking back, I understood that process and I've carried it with me my whole entire life.
Speaker 2:
So take us back to those battles with your brothers. So, you being that, you being the younger one, what? What was that like? Is that where a lot of your competitive nature came from?
Speaker 1:
a thousand percent. I just told my brother today. I was like man, I'm gonna pay you back still for busting my nose. We have boxing matches with gloves and they're beating me up. I'm going against both of them. You know like, fight one brother, then the next brother, I fight. I'm like watch, I'll go against each other and I'll never forget my nose got busted and my mother hit those boxing gloves forever. But they would double team me.
Speaker 1:
You know I have a video. My wife and my son laughs at it because I'm on the curve Crying and pouting because they won't throw me in the ball, because we're playing sideline kill, which are run up this and they're still hitting me. So they taught me how to be tough. They taught me how to be resilient and they taught me how to really grind for what I wanted. So I'm grateful for them and even though at the time I feel like they were being hard on me, what they were doing was teaching me a set of principles and, as you like to say, standards to live by in order to make my dream come true. So I always attribute my athletic success to them, because I want to beat them more than anything else.
Speaker 2:
And now I know, as you age, you're making sure that you look like a linebacker these days instead of a wide receiver, just in case any family meals, any wrestling matches break out.
Speaker 1:
Absolutely. Yeah, I'm bigger than my brothers, now for sure, like I'm probably about 20 30 pounds bigger than them. So you know, it's a it's a little bit different, now for sure.
Speaker 2:
I'm telling you, when we met, that's what I said yeah, I'm like man, you could be able, you could be a linebacker now if you went back to the league. Now, one of the things about the NFL and a lot of individuals don't realize this so I, you know I was really a basketball player. That's what a lot of guys tease me Like man, how do you start doing all this work and collegiate and pro football? You were a Hooper and so what a lot of people don't realize and I didn't know this until I started working in the NFL it's back when you were playing, there were rookie symposiums and in the rookie symposiums they would tell the players you have a better chance of getting struck by lightning Than playing in the NFL. Like that's how rare it is To take the talent that God gave you and to take it to the place that you took it to.
Speaker 2:
What I want to focus on is not success that you had on the field. I'd rather talk about the adversity, which is how you really helped shape people to understand where that authentic power lies. So you, essentially, you have this dream. You reach this pinnacle that people in a lifetime better chance of getting struck by lightning. And that's what you walk into, that's what you embrace. And then there was a period of time trend. It ended for you, but when it ended for you, you had this, this, this bright, right light and epiphany, where you basically took out a phone, you start filming videos and rehab time started. Can you take us back to that dark time for you when you had to say goodbye to football? But it was really the opening of all these lives that you've touched and you continue to touch all over the world.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, it was the hardest time of my life up to a few years ago, and the reason it was hard I like to explain to people that you know, don't play sports. Just imagine losing your everything, the everything that you thought was the world. Since you were four years old. I was programmed, sent a kid, to be an athlete. Of course, my parents made sure I take care of my grades and they made sure I knew that I was more than the athlete, but I didn't want to hear that. All I wanted to do was either play football, basketball, baseball and make it to the lead.
Speaker 1:
So when that was over, I felt as if my life was over. It's like what am I supposed to do? I never worked at nine to five, I mean in college. If you try to do an internship, they gonna laugh at you. So what do I do with my life? And a lot of athletes get to that point and I remember being in my parents House in my room and I just got cut for like the eighth time from the Seattle Seahawk Actually the Washington Ranskins at the time commanders now and I remember looking around my room at all the trophies, my, my roommate, one of my best friends that just committed suicide, tristan, my son. He was one year old at the time and I remember asking this question Like is this it Is it over for me? And I had no external evidence that something was more for my life. I want to be clear about that.
Speaker 3:
But I had an internal alignment that says you're made for more a major part of reaching your peak performance Is having the right people in your life or organization, and to help with that, we are proud to introduce our strategic partner, spark companies. No matter the industry or workforce needs, spark companies provide extremely effective solutions for leadership, recruitment, staffing and other workforce solutions. For our listeners, spark is offering a no-cost Consultative session to help identify your specific needs and how they might be able to help. To schedule your free consultation, head over to Ben Newman. Net forward slash spark. That's been human. Net forward slash SP a R K. Now let's get back into the show.
Speaker 1:
This is not the end, is just the beginning. And so what I did was I Decided to do what was in my control to do. I still use football as a motivator. I say you know what is rehab time? Rehab time wasn't to be a speaker, it wasn't to start an organization. Rehab time simply meant I got some weaknesses mind, body and soul. I'm gonna put some strength, some strengths, back into these weaknesses so I can come back stronger. So I started reading. When I didn't read books, I started getting into my words spiritually and I dedicated my, my physical health, hitting 24 hours fitness at 12 am In the gym.
Speaker 1:
And what happened during those times is I found myself. I gave myself a Slimmer of light that said there's something more in your future. And what I decided to do? I started to document the journey and I would go live. At this time it was blog TV or you stream. It wasn't even like Facebook or anything like that, and people will watch.
Speaker 1:
And people would ask me questions like you know, how do I get over this and how do I get through this? And, by default, me not even knowing what I'm doing. I'm giving them answers. So they said can you come back tomorrow? And I was like I can't come back tomorrow, so how about I just start recording these YouTube videos? So I went to YouTube and that's how rehab time started. It started for myself, not for anybody else, and that was the hardest thing to make myself believe that there was more to my life, when there seemed like there was no evidence of that. But I kept moving forward, step by step, inch by inch. I didn't even know been what the destination was, I didn't know. I didn't know where I was going, but I knew where I could not afford to stay at and I just took the first step that I knew so it's interesting because I Know I've heard you say it many times and it's on, it's on your Instagram, I mean it's everywhere.
Speaker 2:
I love the words authentic power. You know it's interesting hearing you tell this because now I look at you and I hear those words and I say to myself Okay, so at one point time you thought the deepest, strongest authentic power that lied in you was your ability to play football. But it actually took Getting to the point where those stands were empty and they weren't coming to watch you run routes anymore and you weren't gonna be catching footballs anymore, to go to that dark place to have to find your authentic power. And I think there's amazing power in that, because there's so many people, because they face challenge in adversity, they choose to get weak Rather than understanding. That's your opportunity to find your greatest strength. Is that what authentic power means to you?
Speaker 1:
absolutely like. This is the crazy part, ben, and I know you can identify with this, and it became real to me is when I went back in the city in Fort Worth and the places that Used to let me in for free, that knew me. Things change. Like I would go up to the club and who you know, I would try to have this relation. People started to treat me different because I didn't have that title by my name and I realized at that time, like power is not always some some strong strength, bravado that we see online all the time. That that's, that's a part of it. But sometimes power I believe the most authentic power is going through your hardest struggle and Committing yourself not to surrender. Always say strength is under, but pain that's been repaired. That's true power.
Speaker 1:
When you're meeting adversity, that's when you see what you're truly made of. So for me, adversity is not a bad thing. Adversity when is a mask? Adversity's mask is oh, this is bad, adversity, oh, this is gonna in my life. Actually, you take the mask off of adversity. All adversity is an opportunity to show what you're really made of, and so I Realized that in those moments like wait a minute, this is the time to show my faith. This is the time to show my resilience. This is the time to see if I'm really built for it. And that's where I found my true confidence. Not in the success, not enough people yelling my name, not in the millions of followers. I found my confidence at rock bottom Because I knew if I could go through all of these things and survive that and make it out of that, then what else can stop me in this world without my permission?
Speaker 2:
So the answer to that and we're going to make this tough on you again the only thing that can stop it is you. And so, before we take everybody to 2016, because you found that authentic power, then 2016 happens right, and so a lot of times, people think it's this outside circumstance that stops them. But I hope you're paying attention. If you've got to run that thing back two or three times and keep listening to what Trent said, nothing can really stop you, really, except for you, and we all, the older that we get, we want to build these skyscrapers in our imagination rather than the perspective. I've been through something tougher than this, so I just got to keep it moving, one day at a time. But we all reach those points where it is you versus you and sometimes you break down, and that's not easy. I've been there, I know you've been there, and that resurfaced for you in 2016. Take us back there.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, 2016. I'm on a world tour, my own tour. We did 32, all major cities in the US, four outside the US, and it was tough because externally, on paper, things looked great, things were going great Sold out events. My following is going up. People know who I am, but there are some things around me that was taking away my peace. There were some things around me that I was allowing to continue for certain reasons and I remember being in San Francisco one night and it was my event there Sold out event.
Speaker 1:
I go on stage and I do my thing. I'm burnt out already but I muster up the strength to do my thing and I impact the audience. They're yelling, they get filled, but I'm empty. After the event, I go in my room backstage, go out in my room, start crying and I go out to this little alley. It was at a theater, so I had a little alley. I'm breaking down and I'll never forget this. This is where the words protect your peace comes from.
Speaker 1:
There was a houseless man. I want to say he's homeless, I don't know, but he looked like he'd been through some things. He's walking down this alley and my first reaction like who's this dude? I got money in my pocket. But he walks up to me and he says oh, you're the guy that everybody's here to see. And I was like, yeah, that's me. And he said, wow, it must suck to be you. And I looked at him like what? And he says I see you. I see your eyes are red, I see you're stressed. You know you're making everybody happy, but it seems like you're losing yourself. And so I reach in my pocket because in my way I'm like I want to just bless this guy to get him out my face. So I reach in my pocket, hand him $100 bill.
Speaker 1:
He says I don't want that. He says don't feel sorry for me, I feel sorry for you. He says you might look at me and think that I have nothing, but I have a nothing that means everything because I have peace. He said you, on the flip side, have everything. That means nothing because you have no peace. From that moment on I went on a journey to understand what peace means to me and I made it the pinnacle of my life, the main priority in my life. If I don't have peace, I don't want it, I don't want to be around it, because everything without peace is nothing and it's miserable. So that night really changed my life and I made some changes. I stepped away from social media. I had to make some changes on my team that were hard to make, but I decided to prioritize my peace and it changed everything for me.
Speaker 2:
And now we fast forward to today and there's so much even in between there that we could go to, but I want to make sure we spend time here. You now have decided to take that message and everything that happened with how you decided to show up after that moment to now, on March the 5th, you're going to drop your next book Protect your Peace. So tell us about the book and how the book is now going to help bring people to their peace, just the way that you were brought to peace from that situation with that man that night.
Speaker 1:
Absolutely. I would ask the question, everybody listening Would you rather and I'll just use a million dollars would you rather a million dollars without peace, or would you rather you know a decent lifestyle with peace? And that's something that you gotta think about. But I think the majority of people would say man, I want peace, and the thing that I see so often I've been guilty of this too is that we give our peace away so freely. We give our peace to people who don't deserve it. We give our peace away to circumstances, and there's so many people who are successful, there's so many people who are not successful that are living a life without peace and that life is miserable.
Speaker 1:
So this book is really gonna show you how to protect your peace in three ways, right? Number one is gonna show you how to protect your energy from the things that drain it. You know we don't have an infinite amount of energy and a lot of us we give our energy away to things that have no purpose, hold no purpose for our life. The second section of this book is gonna focus on protecting your mind from the things that disturb it. You know, I'm really big on focus. I'm really big on perspective, and this is the greatest war that you will ever have Not an external war, but an internal war, and if you don't win this battle, life is gonna be tough. And then the last section is protect your soul from the things that don't fulfill it.
Speaker 1:
I'm really big on fulfillment and I think fulfillment is the thing that we all seek, that we all want, and I think if you can live a life of fulfillment, you know you can be happy. And people always say happiness works on what's happening. I do agree, but I do believe that there's an internal happiness that doesn't have to work off of what's happening. It's literally a choice that says I'm gonna be happy. Because this is what I know is true, Ben, I believe the happiest people have the healthiest perspective, and so this book is gonna help you develop that perspective that serves your life.
Speaker 2:
I'm so excited for the book to come out and I just wanna make sure I'm gonna make it as easy as possible Y'all hear me as easy as possible. Now. I'm gonna do two things, because Trent is my guide. He's one of those guys. When we met it was like man, like I wish we would have met a long time ago.
Speaker 2:
But now we just gotta take it further from here. But two things I'm gonna ask. Number one. Number one we're gonna make it so easy. We're gonna drop in the show notes, we're gonna link it straight to Amazon so we can make sure it's gonna happen without me saying this. But we gotta make sure that this book gets into as many hands as possible, because this is gonna tie into the final question that I'm gonna ask Trent, because this is a book that everybody needs.
Speaker 2:
Anybody who says that you don't need to address those three things or be reminded of those three things throughout your life, you're not being real with yourself, and so I encourage everybody make sure you pick up a copy of the book, and you probably need to pick up a copy of the book for somebody that you care about that also needs to read the book. And then when the book comes out in March and we're gonna see who has good memories when the book drops on March the 5th, the first 100 listeners that reach out to me, I'm gonna make sure we're gonna find a way that we buy the copy of the book for you. So, logistically, this is when our team gets mad at me. I'm gonna figure it out behind the scenes logistically. But I'm gonna make sure you send me to infoatbennewmannet, but you gotta wait till the week of. So if you send it to me, like when we dropped this episode, that doesn't count. Like you gotta buy the book now and then on March the 5th you gotta hit me up and I'm gonna buy you another copy of the book or send it to somebody that you're close to.
Speaker 2:
So, infoatbennewmannet, you'll send me name and address and I'm gonna buy a copy of Protect your Peace, because people need this message in the world. And this is my guy. And the reason why I wanna do that is because I shared with Trent the way he moved me that day in LA and man, it was awesome. I mean, laurie Harder was amazing that day. Ed Milette was amazing that day, brennan Burchard I don't know about you, trent, I just felt honored to be on the stage that day.
Speaker 2:
And you and I got done and I'm like the level of authenticity, transparency and just how you keep it real is so needed in this world. And like you blew me away, I was like man. I could just sit and listen to you speak and I loved it. And what I loved about it is you made a decision and it was clear to me that day a long time ago when I step on that stage, I'm gonna be me and when I step on that stage, you're gonna get all of me. Can you speak into people's hearts who are trying to be somebody else, somebody who maybe they've lost their peace because they're fighting so hard to be somebody else? They've gotten lost in the chase and the comparison and they haven't realized that authentic power in just becoming the very best version of themselves. And I'd love for you to finish this up that way, because you just blew me away with this. I mean, it was clear like you are you and I love it.
Speaker 1:
Thank you, ben. I appreciate you, man, first of all for the books and the supporting and for who you are. Thank you so much. And to the person listening to this that's struggling with being themselves, I would tell you what my grandmother told me and blessed her soul. She said, Trent, everybody in this world is taken. Your ultimate power is you. You're able to reach people that nobody can reach, just like you listening to this right now. You're able to reach people that me and Ben can't reach. But you'll never meet the people who are meant to be in your path if you don't walk the path that's meant for you.
Speaker 1:
I want you to think about this Are you living the life that's truly meant for you? Are you living the life that your circumstances gave you, that your past gave you, that people's opinions put on you? That's a hard life to live. You know Ben talks about me being authentic and coming from my heart. You know why? Because it's too hard trying to be someone else. It's too hard being stuck in my mind. So I decided just to be who I am, whether people like it or not, because that's where my peace is. So I encourage you to embrace your flaws, embrace the imperfect you because it's still perfect for the purpose that's meant for your life.
Speaker 2:
There, you all have it. Here's what I want you to do. I want you to run that back the second time of the episode. I want everybody to listen to that three times. And then I want you to make sure you share this episode with somebody Because, like I said, it's one of the things that I love about you.
Speaker 2:
You're getting real and we're living in a world that just isn't real anymore. Everywhere you turn, you know you go to a restaurant and you're sitting there and an entire family's arguing and they're stuck on their phones until the waitress comes by and then the dad's like, oh, let's grab a picture. And then you take a family picture as if they love each other and they've been. I know they love each other, but as if they've been engaged the entire meal and then they go back to have and it's like they're gonna post this picture as if they were all engaged and having fun and enjoying it and they cared more about their phones than they did the engagement with each other. That's the world that we live in.
Speaker 2:
So you can't tell me that people don't need to hear this message. You can't tell me that people don't need to read this book, because we need to protect our peace, we need to find our authentic selves, and that's the way that you need to live and that's why you all know why I was so fired up To bring Trent Shelton on the burn. Trent, I cannot thank you enough. Thank you for taking the time. I know you get requests all the time, so it means the world to me for you to take the time and just man, thank you. Thank you for being you.
Speaker 1:
Thanks, Ben. I appreciate you for having me, man, and keep being legendary, keep inspiring us, man, and I'm grateful for just the time to be on your podcast. Thanks, bro.
Speaker 2:
Well, I continue to look forward to Stay Connected. I appreciate you, and it's not just he and I. Stay Connected. We're gonna make sure that we're gonna make it so simple for you to stay connected with Trent his message, the release of the book so that you can accurately have your reminders, so I can buy you a copy of the book, how you can purchase the book pre-purchase now. We'll get all of that information to you. And remember why and purpose is not enough. You must find that authentic power that comes from that burn, that lies inside of you, that ignites that why and purpose and causes you to be disciplined on the days you don't wanna do it and especially after you win. This has been the Burn and I'll see you next week. Ruinedlazy.